The dreaded day has come, friends. The Fosters season one finale has come and gone, and it was all the craziness we were hoping for and more!
We pick up where we left off in the police car, where Stef tells Brandon not to tell anyone what happened with Ana until they know what to do. Outside, Stef explains to Mike that she thought Jesus was the one who tried to pay Ana off, but she realized he knows nothing about it and never thought it could be Brandon. She doesn’t want people to think Mike put Brandon up to it, so she insists she’ll handle it entirely herself. One condition; she wants Brandon to come home. Back at his apartment, Mike rightfully rails at Dani for secretly helping Brandon and breaks up with her. But Dani hasn’t completed her secret evil plan yet!
When she returns home, Stef casually omits the truth behind Brandon’s bad behavior when she speaks with Lena. Lena believes that Brandon will probably be expelled for the fake IDs, and Stef sadly asks, “What happened to our son?” Ultimately, Stef meets with Ana and tells her that she’ll get her the $10,000, but she never wants to see her again.
Mariana visits Zac (and his 90s boyband hairstyle), and explains that Zac really needs to help his mother see a doctor now after the constant incidents that range from forgetful to violent. Zac finally explains that his mother has early onset Alzheimer's and the reason he was so uncomfortable about dating is because he needs to take care of her. If she gets put in a home, he’ll have to live with his dad, thus being torn apart from Mariana.
While hanging out with Connor, Jude gets a call from his classmate Maddie who wants to go on a movie with him. Connor seems as though maybe he’s jealous, but it turns out he’s been wanting to ask Maddie out for a while. Jude’s clearly prickly about this, and admits he doesn’t like Maddie, but nothing more about any potential feelings for Connor.
Mariana, amused by this whole ‘young love’ situation (and desperately in need of something to be amused by) approaches Jesus and asks him to give Jude advice on girls. Jesus admits he’s not the best to give advice since Emma thinks he’s a total jackass after his aggressive behavior at the winter ball. However, back at school Jesus tells Emma he’s decided to start going back on his meds. Emma, whose heart is softened, admits she’s not seeing Jackass Kyle anymore. Jesus asks if they can start over, and they kiss. So glad someone’s relationship isn’t tragically crashing and burning!
Lena meets with Timothy about the donor contract, but finds that Timothy doesn’t want to sign it. He can’t get past the idea he’d have a child out in the world whose life he couldn’t be in, explaining, “I think it would just destroy me.” Wow, Timothy, you went from 0 to 60 in 3.5. It looks like Lena jumped the gun a bit and might already be pregnant. Stef, who already wasn’t into this whole ‘baby’ thing to begin with, is now super not on board. Lena tells Stef she needs to tell her if she doesn’t want to have baby, and Stef does just that. You can just about literally hear Lena’s heart break.
But there’s some good news, viewers! Brandon’s back to piano and he has a big audition for the junior symphony coming up! Callie visits and tells him she wants to be in the family more than anything, but she doesn’t want to hurt him. Brandon says she’s not hurting him, and they hug it out. It really is so nice to not hate Brandon so much anymore.
A little later on, Lena hisses at Stef, “You’ll be happy to hear that I just got my period.” Stef sits Lena down to tell her honestly how scared she is to have a baby when they’re kids are already causing so much madness. She also finally tells the truth about Brandon and Ana. Lena doesn’t believe she’ll actually pay Ana off, and Stef confesses she’s going to wear a wire and record Ana trying to extort a police officer.
Dani comes home to Brandon being a total, drunken mess on the couch while mourning the loss of Callie, his one true love. She reminds Brandon his audition is tomorrow and takes him to bed. This would be kinda of acceptable if it didn’t immediately get creepy, with her telling him to take off his pants. She tearfully tells Brandon he deserves better than Callie; someone who can appreciate the endless list of abundant qualities she somehow manages to fabricate. Then they kiss (cause we haven’t seen that coming from lightyears away). But then they’re shirtless. And they’re the sexin’! Oy Brandon, what has life become for you?
The next day, Brandon wakes up to a drunken, pathetic message of apologies from Mike, and calls Dani to ask for help since his father has clearly fallen off the wagon. In true Brandon style, none of this is going well. However, Brandon is still able to make it to his audition, and Stef even shows up to support him.