Here’s what I mean when I say this. There’s this idea in certain cultures, and among certain groups of men, that tops aren’t gay. If you’re the top ("activo," or the one receiving blowjobs from guys) as opposed to being the bottom ("pasivo," or the one giving blowjobs), you’re not gay, you’re just being a "manly man." I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news. If you’re getting your D sucked daily by different dudes, you’re probbbabbbbllllyyyy not straight. I feel like many TOTAL tops are still obsessed with masculinity and have some weird internalized homophobia or sex negativity they need to deal with. (Obviously this isn’t all of total tops, but this has been my experience with many of the total tops I’ve met.)
Vers men aren’t like that. They just get it: you can act as top, you can act as bottom, you can act however the hell you want cause...why not??