Drag Race UK Star Baby Explains Show Exit: 'I Was Really Unwell'

We're only five episodes into the fourth season of RuPaul's Drag Race UK and the drama is almost as fierce as the competition.

Last week, the remaining girls took on the season's Rusical, Lairy Poppins, and smashed it out of the park. So much so that the judges were splitting hairs to determine who would be on the chopping block. After tough deliberation, Baby and Dakota Schiffer ended up in the bottom two, both for the second time, and lip-synced for their lives to "No Way" by Cast of Six and Renée Lamb.

The win could've gone either way but before Ru could announce who would sashay away, Baby took control of the situation and sent herself packing.

"I'm extremely grateful for being here," she told the judges. "But, um, I think I need to go home and take care of myself."

"I respect that," RuPaul replied.

Now, a few days since the episode aired, Baby has opened up about what she was really going through that the cameras didn't catch.

“The emotions that came out on episode five were a very small window into what was actually going on for me, and the reality is, I was really unwell,” she shared on Twitter. “A lot of what you saw on camera was me ‘switching it on’ and I’d gotten to a point where that was no longer sustainable for me and my well-being.

“I was having aggressive and frequent panic attacks, then just walking into the work room, a challenge, the runway, or untucked acting like NOTHING had happened.”

Baby went on to detail two specific behind-the-scenes moments with her competitors that impacted her decision. “The morning of the improv challenge, Sminty hugged me because she could tell how unhappy I was and I burst into tears before wiping my face and getting in front of cameras like, ‘Right, girlies, let’s get into these improv characters.’

“That same episode, Cheddar held me in their arms as I had a panic attack right before we went into untucked and I sat there trying my best to hold my shit together, more worried about how my actions may be perceived by those watching at home than thinking about what was good for me.”

Baby says she decided to go home the night before the Rusical "when I was in my hotel room doubled-over in crippling pain from my anxiety” but completed the challenge so as to not let her sisters down.

“Backstage just before we walked the runway in our musical looks I remember looking over at Le Fil and covering my mic to tell them, ‘I can’t be here any more, I need to go home’, feeling like the importance of my well-being was a dirty secret that needed to be hidden in order for us to make this show.”

Fans have rallied around the drag queen, and she knows just how loved she is. "Btw this is how I'm doing," she posted on social media yesterday with a video of her performing on stage.

Baby has also released a song called "Theatre" about the experience, which is now available on iTunes.

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