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9 Ways Gaston Made Us Question Our Sexuality

9 Ways Gaston Made Us Question Our Sexuality

9 Ways Gaston Made Us Question Our Sexuality
ZacharyZane_

Disney's Gaston from Beauty and the Beast may be a misogynistic and arrogant prick, but there's no use denying we had a fat crush on him the moment he flexed his biceps. Gaston may not have won over Belle’s heart, but he sure won over ours. Gaston has so many great qualities; no one's slick as Gaston. No one's quick as Gaston No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gaston. Here are nine ways Gaston made us question our orientation:

1. His smile

 

Boy, do those pearly whites sparkle. Is it weird that you kind of want to lick his teeth?

2. That hair

Now that's a REAL man. 

3. His guns

Those aren’t biceps. Those are footballs covered in human skin.

 

4. He's roughly as big as a barge

Does anyone actually know what a barge is? Could have sworn he said "barn."

5. He's devoted to personal hygene

Who doesn’t love a man who takes care of himself?

6. He's a fabulous decorator

He’s an interior designer too? Is there anything he can’t do?

7. He's dramatic and has flair

So much passion. So little time.

8. His cleft chin

It's like he has two butts.

9. He's dedicated to fitness and nutrition

Salmonella? More like ciao bella.

And, just in case you forgot, there's no one quite like Gaston.

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Zachary Zane

Zachary Zane is a writer, YouTube influencer, and activist whose work focuses on (bi)sexuality, gender, dating, relationships, and identity politics. Check out his YouTube channel here.

Zachary Zane is a writer, YouTube influencer, and activist whose work focuses on (bi)sexuality, gender, dating, relationships, and identity politics. Check out his YouTube channel here.