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Being aware is a great first step.
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The other day I was having coffee with a friend. “I love trans people, but I do not feel like I need to identify as cisgender,” my friend stated. She went on to say, “I am not transgender, I was born a woman and identify as a woman. Why should I say I am “cis” and how do I have ‘cisgender’ privilege? I’m just normal. How is being normal a privilege?”
What she didn’t realize was that saying she was normal – while speaking to me, a transgender man, as unintentionally “abnormal” – is exactly where cis privilege starts.
Here are a few cis privilege examples I gave my friend and I hope they help other ally folks too!
1. Bathroom Safety
Most cis people, excluding those with disabilities, do not have to worry about whether they will be able to find a safe and accessible bathroom or locker room to use. Let alone, whether or not the state you live in will attempt to pass legislation making it illegal to use a public restroom that aligns with your gender identity.
2. Freedom to Flirt
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Even if people aren't interested in you, you have the freedom to flirt with whoever you wish. There's always a certain tact that goes into flirting either way, of course, but people aren't likely to get physically violent with you for flirting when you're cis.
3. Your Mental Stability Isn't Questioned
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Well, it might be, but if it is it's for something totally unrelated to gender. Anyone who identifies as trans or nonbinary or anything that society doesn't deem "normal" is also thought to have some sort of mental incapacity that forces them to align with the gender or identity they most feel represents them.
4. You're Less Likely to be Profiled as a Sex Worker
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A lot of people assume trans people -- trans women, in particular -- will immediately be put into some sort of sex working environment. First of all, no shame to the sex workers, regardless of their gender or identity expression. Second of all, part of the reason that even happens in the first place is a fetish fantasy regarding trans women, which makes their mistreatment all the worse.
5. You're Accurately Depicted in Movies
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Even though queer film is becoming more prevalent and queer characters are doing the same, there's often a lot of stereotypes that go into those characterizations and movies that aren't completely accurate. Cisgendered people are more accurately depicted than anyone else, regardless of sexual orientation.
6. Freedom of “Passing”
Cis people do not have to choose between either feeling invisible through "passing" or being regularly "othered" by being out/not passing. The "othering process" makes it so that trans identity is often not taken seriously, leads to the person being misgendered, and tokenized based on their gender. Most cis people don't have to deal with this.
7. Your Boundaries Are By and Large Respected
Random people don’t believe they can ask you what your genitals look like and how you have sex.
8. Your Name Isn’t Questioned
For the most part, strangers call you by the name you give them, and they don’t ask what your “real name” (birth name) is and then assume that they have a right to call you by that name (or dead-name you).
9. You Are Generally Safe in Sex-Segregated Spaces
Cisgender folks don’t need to be concerned about being placed in a sex-based detention center, jail or prison that is different from your gender, and could lead to serious levels of abuse.
10. Your I.D. Won’t Cause You Trouble
Staff members, police officers, or anyone else who checks your identification or drivers license won’t question you, insult you, or glare at you because your name or sex does not match the name you go by or the gender you present as.
11. You Get To See Yourself Represented Everywhere
The media depicts people of cis identity in films and television, all day - everyday. Cis identity isn’t only used as the concentration of a dramatic, exploitative, storyline or the punch line for a joke, the way that trans stories and bodies often are. Although, shows like Transparent, Orange Is the New Black, Faking It and Sense8 are working to change that, there's a long, long way to go.
12. You Don’t Have to Face Potential Transphobia When Making Friends
When you make a new friend, you don't have to contemplate whether or not you should tell them about your gender identity. Because being in a position to possibly have to educate them feels too exhausting or they might reject and hurt you.
13. Murder, Harassment, and Physical Harm
Despite strides for trans visibility, according to the HRC in a study released in 2023 they have, "recorded the deaths of 335 transgender and gender non-conforming victims of fatal violence–including at least 33 deaths in the last 12 months." Obviously, cisgender people are targets of for crime, but trans people are often called out merely on the basis that they are trans.
14. Your Body Parts Don’t Aren’t Forced to Be Front and Center When Dating
Cis folks can easily start online dating profiles, go on dates, cruise, or form a relationships and not worry that your sex assigned at birth may be cause for dismissal or assault, nor will it cause your lover to feel like they now need to question their sexual identity.
15. It’s Easier for You to Financially Support Yourself
Trans folks experience job discrimination at an astonishing rate. According to GLAAD, trans folks are four times more likely to be unemployed than cis people, and due to this, face homelessness. Most of the United States and other countries do not offer legal protections in housing, employment, health care, and other areas where folks experience bias based on their gender identity.
