I only clean my apartment when a trick from Grindr or Scruff or Tinder or Craigslist (I'm on all the apps) comes over. It's important I sleep around so my apartment actually stays clean. In doing so, I have developed a very strict regimen of things to do while getting ready for hook-ups.
Here are 14 things all gay men should do before their trick knocks on the door.
Awkward silences are the worst. Your solution? Spotify. My go to is Death Cab for Cutie. So much so, I know exactly what track I should be ejaculating to during a 45 minute hook-up. Frank Ocean, Rihanna's last album, and Lana Del Rey are also good go-tos. Or if you're feeling a little dirtier, put on Ms. Nicki Minaj. If you are really feeling emotions, then obviously it's Celine.