Non-binary model Rain Dove is showing us how sometimes, being patient with people who come across as homophobic and transphobic might help save a life.
Dove recently shared a conversation they had with a parent whose child had asked for a binder for Christmas.
“My child is sick due to you,” came the first message from the angry mother.
Dove waited as the mom said that their kid now “wants to be a boy” and “asked for a strap thing for her chest for Christmas.”
“My child hates her body because of perverts like you is how I feel,” she said.
Dove soothed her, letting her know it’s obvious she cares a lot for her kid if it’s this important to her that he doesn’t hate his body. And though the mom was initially 100% against the idea of her kid wearing a binder, Dove let her know some of the reasons it would be better for her child if she was on board.
“The reason a binder is great is because they are medically [a much] safer option than alternatives your kid may be turning to when you’re not around,” they said, also pointing out that gender dysphoria can lead to self-harm and even suicide.
“A little piece of medically approved fabric can literally save their life. One that You clearly adore and care about.”
While the mother is still potentially misgendering her child by the end of the back and forth, it’s obvious to see she’s become more open to buying her kid a binder, and potentially realizing that staying closed off to conversations about gender could be incredibly harmful to her child.
Patience and actively engaging with angry people who seem to hate who you are certainly isn’t always the right option, but sometimes, when it’s possible, it can turn into something positive.