By now you’ve probably heard of Alcatraz, the J.J. Abrams sci-fi TV thriller whose main conceit is that instead of being reassigned to different prisons when the brutal prison located on a rock outside San Francisco closed, all 63 inmates and prison personnel vanished on March 21, 1963.
To swallow the show’s premise one must imagine that apparently neither the missing prisoners and personnel’s family members or the legions of prison history buffs noticed they were gone until the feds recruited a spunky blonde cop and her comic book loving friend to discover that the prisoners are returning (one per week, so convenient), looking exactly as they did, nearly 50 years later.
Fans of creator J.J. Abrams — the guy who gave us Jennifer Garner in leather and PVC for Alias, and some other stuff with a little fan favorite called Lost — have tuned in droves, but that doesn’t mean they understand the show yet. (Shades of Lost, anyone?) But you don’t have to understand in total yet in order to enjoy it. There are three hot chicks who are worth the price of tuning in alone.
Sarah Jones (not to be confused with the wonderful black lesbian performance poet) plays Detective Rebecca Madson, a butchy but bland cop leading the investigations. So far, all we know is that she thought her grandfather was a guard at Alcatraz, but turns out he was an inmate. If the producers don’t want her to be gay on the show, they should probably fix her wardrobe, because it screams comfortable lesbian.
The breathtakingly beautiful Parminder Nagra (remember her? Jesminder on Bend it Like Beckham!) plays Lucy, some kind of time traveling doctor slash scientist who is now in a coma (yes, her coma acting is better than some of the other characters).
And best of all, lesbian actress Geri Jewell who is beloved from Facts of Life and was brilliant on Deadwood. She appeared first in Monday’s episode of Alcatraz as Geri Tiller, the cougarish sister of warden Tiller. For anyone not familiar with Jewell’s work, the actress — who has cerebral palsy, a disease that affects motor function — the role was refreshing. Though the characters around her used insults expected of the time period (one calls her the warden’s “gimp” sister, for example), Jewell flirts with the jailbait waiter, and chews up the scenery around her in a way that differently-abled women are never portrayed on TV (sexual, that is).
Sure, there were vagina jokes, some stiff acting (or overacting), a strange tangle of plots that made no sense, and a laughable scene in which the writers tried to make us believe that women being seduced were all in their mid-40s (if that’s the case, then I’m 65), but just 5 minutes with Jewell made it all worth it.
Here's Jewell discussing her role on the show:
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