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We Need to Talk About Arielle Scarcella's Video on Trans Women & Dating 'Preferences'

We Need to Talk About Arielle Scarcella's Video on Trans Women & Dating 'Preferences'

We Need to Talk About Arielle Scarcella's Video on Trans Women & Dating 'Preferences'

...and other infuriating news stories from the past week that need your attention.


Welcome to Dear Marsha, a weekly column where writer Jayson Flores rounds up the new stories that matter to the queer community and examines them through the original, intersectional, radical, inclusive lenses with which the queer rights movement was founded. For more on Dear Marsha (like why it's called that) check out more posts in the series!

It's been a crazy week, everyone...

YouTuber Arielle Scarcella Wants Trans Women to Know She Doesn’t Want to Sleep With Them

I hate giving Internet space to the voices of negativity, but for the sake of conversations that the LGBT community needs to be having, I’m going to talk about Arielle Scarcella. For the majority of us that don’t know her, Scarcella is an out, lesbian YouTuber who​, according to the "About" section on her YouTube channel, "loves LGBT culture" and talks about "sex, dating, gender, love, relationships and life! (And hot girls of course)" in her content.

Being a YouTuber means she shares a lot of her opinions and thoughts with a sense of self-importance, and this weekend she decided to create a video reacting to, in her own click-bait words, a "Homophobic SJW."

Though she claims to be an LGBT advocate in her Twitter bio, Arielle and a friend spend the entire video showing exactly how the queer community turns on trans people. In said video, they are reacting to another YouTuber by the name of NeonFiona (known simply as Fiona) who made a video about how it is transphobic for a lesbian to say they’re not attracted to trans women. While Scarcella and friend could’ve stated their ignorant opinions and left it at that, they chopped up Fiona’s video (which is currently unavailable) to a near non-recognizable point and proceeded to mock her after every few words without allowing her video to have much context of its own. It’s quite painful to watch.

Trans activist and YouTuber Kat Blaque sounded off on Scarcella on Twitter and hit the nail on the head.

Fiona’s partner, fellow trans activist and YouTuber Riley J. Dennis, also spoke up.

Since Scarcella’s video, Fiona has made her Twitter private (though it's now public again) and has deleted a lot of videos from her YouTube channel (no doubt due to the backlash that Scarcella's video encouraged).

This is a prime example of how the trans community gets treated and how any statement from trans people about the queer community becomes grounds for immediate attack, though the community is salty when trans people attack back.

I’ll keep this simple for folks. Trans people are not worried about cis people who don't want to sleep them. Preferences are prejudice, no matter how hurt your feelings are or how justified you feel, because at the end of the day you’re judging your reactions to an entire group of people you haven’t met yet (unless you’ve, for example, met every trans woman on the planet). No one’s asking you to want to have sex with everyone, but declaring "preferences" publicly does nothing but reinforce negative cultural norms which put white, able-bodied, fit, cis people at the top and everyone else below, and those farthest from those norms at the very bottom. Keep your "preferences" to yourself.

Yes, Your Dating Preferences Are Probably Racist

And speaking of "preferences," here is some recommended reading from The Establishment about how preferences are, in fact, exclusionary and wrong, and how your preferences are not just your own, but are also a reflection of society.

The Family Research Council Thinks Lying About Transgender Troops Is a Christian Value


Important reminder this week, and every week

A post shared by HuffPost Queer Voices (@huffpostqueervoices) on

This piece from HuffPost is a lot to unload, but it is important to be aware of the trans antagonistic voices of some so-called "Christian" orgs that support a transgender military ban.

To my trans friends and family, please take care of yourself. America is baring its teeth against you and you’re standing strong as always. We love you and we support you. And those of us who are real allies are here to defend you, to listen to you, and to take action with you. Trans antagonism has no place in this country or anywhere.

What other important LGBT stories were on your radar this past week? Let us know in the comments and on Twitter!

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