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Love at First Sight

Love at First Sight

Out lesbian stand-up comic and blogger Gloria Bigelow questions her ability to fall in love at first sight, with something other than a pair of Manohla Blahniks. 'As I heard two tales of Lesbian Love at first sight in two days I couldn't help but question my own vision. Have I been blind all of these years -- I mean it's never happened to me?'

Do you believe in love at first sight?

I got a little teary-- a little short of breath-- and I had that sinking feeling in
my stomach similar to what happens when your airplane takes a little drop at 30,000 feet. The lighting was perfect. The scene was set. It's as if the universe was focusing my attention with a spotlight -- a feature.

It was love at first sight -- they were the stunning pair of aqua marine blue- Manohlo Blahniks -- the "Cinderella" slippers in the movie Sex In the City!  Even typing about it I feel the butterflies again. But those were shoes. To be fair, they weren't just any pair of shoes. They were incredibly beautiful shoes and they were blue-- perfection--but not a person. People can't be perfect and I've never fallen in love at first sight -- at least not with a person.


We were sitting in a diner somewhere in Maine. She said that it was love at first sight. I was across the table from her and she was beaming and blushing!  I sat curious as she recounted their meeting in detail -- the sweaty palms, the skip of the heart beat, the flip-flopping of the stomach, the nausea. It's as every other sound in the room muted and she could only hear her voice.

That's incredible, right?

I asked another Dyke and she'd had a similar experience:

Hers happened at a softball game -- go figure a dyke at a softball game --what? Mid Spring...flowers blooming, birds chirping and the heavy weight of winter melting away. Spring. We shave, we wax and our skin is thankful for the sunlight -- it's the beginning of something new. She was walking across the softball field, a friend called to her.  She turned around and there SHE was -- the woman who would later become her wife -- pulling her hair up into a ponytail with the sunlight beaming down on her. She got that sinking feeling -- and she knew!!!


As I heard two tales of Lesbian Love at first sight in two days I couldn't help but question my own vision. Have I been blind all of these years -- I mean it's never happened to me? Not in middle school, not at a club... I've never looked across the basketball court at a WNBA game and while the players are stretching and running looked up into the eyes of the one lesbian in Madison square garden who is not wearing a team jersey--and thought -- I FREAKIN LOVE Her. I love her!


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(continued)

 

Am I immune to it?
Am I incapable?  
Am I simply not open enough to know when it's happened?
Maybe it has happened and I've been to busy eating or running for a train or working out at the gym to notice.

Or maybe...it hasn't happened because I don't know if I believe in it.
I mean I absolutely believe in Love - yup -- and I absolutely believe in sight. I just don't know if those two things can go together for me. But there are a few things that do go together for me:

Attraction at first sight. For sure. Confidence, a pretty face, a killer smile, and the right timing almost always get me.

Chemistry at first sight. You betcha. A sense of humor, a lot of charm, ease, and a little laughter will always make me return the call.

Lust at first sight -- it's happened -- two shots of patron or two martinis and I ponder taking her into the bathroom

But love? LOVE -- LoVe at first sight?

Well for me that -- that remains to be seen...over time.

The Advocates with Sonia BaghdadyOut / Advocate Magazine - Jonathan Groff and Wayne Brady

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Gloria Bigelow