Out On Campus: Briar Cliff University

Briar Cliff University is a small liberal arts college of 1,100 students.  This university, affectionately nicknamed ‘the Cliff’ by its students, boasts a friendly atmosphere based on Catholic Franciscan values. Settled on a large hill in Sioux City, IA, the Cliff is also settled amongst conservative political views and a fear of change. Because I enjoy a good challenge, I chose such a place to come into my own, and eventually come out as gay.  Coming from a devout Catholic family and being the oldest daughter of a deacon, I was well aware of the consequences my newfound sexuality would have on my faith.  However, I didn’t realize how completely it would change the dynamic of my life on campus.

As a sophomore in college, I had been struggling to find a label for my sexuality.  I realized that I was bisexual the summer of 2007.  Convinced it was just a phase, I didn’t bother myself with coming out to anyone. This all changed when I traveled down to Kansas for a concert with friends and unknowingly met my future girlfriend. After developing a crush on her, I decided that this was a part of who I was, and I spent a lot of time coming to terms with it.  After a while, halfway through my junior year I decided to slowly take each of my closest friends aside and come out to them.  Their responses amazed me.  Each one was supportive.  Because of the support of so many people, I decided to check out S.O.U.R.C.E. (Students for Openness, Understanding, Respect, Compassion, and Equality), which is the Briar Cliff version of a Gay–Straight Alliance.  At that point, the club was in serious trouble. There was a lack of support from the administration of the university and a lack of support from the students.  Vandalism of the club bulletin board wasn’t uncommon and participation in club activities was low.  In fact, there were only two student members.  I was disheartened and decided to remain under the radar…but this didn’t last long.

I started dating my now girlfriend, Alison, and over time I came to the conclusion that boys really did have cooties, and that I was in fact lesbian. When I had thought I was bisexual, I hadn’t felt that I completely belonged to the gay community.

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But coming out as lesbian, I realized that I had always belonged to such a community and it was partly my responsibility to make sure that the gay population was taken care of on campus.

Only when I decided to get involved did I finally see the politics behind homosexuality on a Catholic Franciscan university campus. I had thought S.O.U.R.C.E. was a cute acronym meant to include everyone into the group, but it turns out it was named as such because the administration didn’t want it to look like they were supporting homosexuality. Also, the club has to be careful not to be too gay. The vandalism of the bulletin board was to be tolerated, because administration took a ‘maybe it’ll stop on its own’ view. Right.

I felt like I was being pushed back into the closet when I had finally gotten comfortable outside of it. I decided to change that. The start of my senior year, I officially joined S.O.U.R.C.E. and was nominated as president. There were several freshmen who had shown an interest in the group and I decided to take advantage of that. I did some asking around, talked with the freshmen, and with their help formed what is now a strong group of 15, all of whom have become some of the best friends I’ve ever had. We now hold meetings twice a month, and have formed a great relationship with the GSA groups of the two other schools in our city (Morningside College and Western Iowa Tech). We support each others group activities and have get-togethers every once in a while.

Because of the growing number of members in the club we’ve been able to host several activities within our school as a way to show that we’re still around. We’ve gained the support of a lot of faculty and staff, and now have four amazing staff advisors to the group.  We’ve also taken steps to fight the discrimination going on across campus.  Having our bulletin board vandalized more this year than ever, several of our club members have talked with the president of the university and other key staff members to figure out how to put a stop to such acts of hatred.  After meeting a little resistance, I’m proud to say that we’re making huge progress. Our board has had less acts of vandalism over the past two months, and precautions are being taken to eliminate them all together.

Overall, I must say that I’m proud to belong to this university. No school is going to be without opposition to homosexuality, but I feel that Briar Cliff has taken steps to reduce the discrimination students face. The students on campus, and especially those in the club are passionate about equality and it shows. I’m also proud of myself for taking the risk to step out of the closet. It has paid off exponentially and I have come to find a great support system here at the Cliff. Since being out of the closet, I’ve found several teachers, especially those within the Psychology department (which is my major), who are very supportive.  Without them, the S.O.U.R.C.E. club, and our relationship with the other schools of Sioux City, I would be one miserable lesbian. Who knew being true to myself as a lesbian would be so liberating!