10 Women You Should Never Have Sex With

Life is messy and complicated, right? We've all been there. But there are some dating-related decisions that are so obviously going to be a disaster for all concerned that it's probably better just to head the impending doom off at the pass.

1)The person you’re ‘meh’ about but who really really wants you.

Let’s face it, this rarely rarely ends well. You’ll still be ‘meh’, they’ll think you’re interested, you’ve done it now so it’s even easier to do it again, and in two months’ time you’re accidentally in a relationship that’s doomed from the start.

2)The ex who’s still in love with you.

No matter how hot they are. You broke up for a reason, remember?

3)The ex you’re still in love with.

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We’ve ALL done this. That’s why we ALL KNOW it’s a terrible idea. Let’s extend the experience of rejection indefinitely just so you can get extra hurt when they hook up with someone else! Or actually no, let’s not do that.

4)The person who’s just really persistent.

The inability to take no for an answer is NOT a sign you should have sex with someone. It’s a pretty strong sign you shouldn’t.

5) The person you don’t really like but feel you ought to.

The heart – and, uh, related areas – work in mysterious ways, but they generally know what they’re doing. If you’re not feeling it, you’re not feeling it, and the chances are bad sex is really not going to change your mind. It’ll just lead to awkward conversations.

6)Your friend’s recent ex.

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Especially if you’ve always nursed a secret bit of a crush. Not unless you’re actually prepared to lose the friendship over it, that is.

7)Your boss.

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Because there are so few good places this can go. If your best case scenario is ‘let us never speak of this again’ it’s not a good sign.

8)Anyone who works for you.

Not only is this one a massively unprofessional breach of trust, it’s a really bad practical move. Someone will find out, they will tell everyone else in the office, and nobody will look you in the eye or listen to you without struggling to keep a straight face anymore. Unless the person in question is actually your freely-consenting-and-amply-compensated sex slave in an organisation no bigger than the two of you, just don’t. When the midden hits the windmill, that shit is on YOU.

9)Your friends’ close relatives.

Even siblings are a bad idea without express invitation from both parties, and anything in the parents/children category is just a no-go zone.

10)Anyone who puts you down.

If their method of seduction is to criticise you, they can go elsewhere. There’s a difference between teasing banter and just plain rude.

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