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8 Life Lessons Jon Stewart Taught All Homophobes

8 Life Lessons Jon Stewart Taught All Homophobes

8 Life Lessons Jon Stewart Taught All Homophobes
YezYes

Jon Stewart has given viewers a sarcastic look into the weird world of American politics for more than sixteen years on The Daily Show. But as he retreats from American television, here's a look at the many life lessons he taught anti-LGBT politicians on TV. 

1. When he gave U.S. politicians a little slice of their own hypocrisy, as they slammed Kenya for being "hostile" to LGBT people, when it had only been a month since marriage equality passed in the United States. 

“What kind of backward, intolerant country would treat people differently just because they’re gay? That is so one month ago."

2. When he taught Republicans an important Harry Potter literary analogy, by sarcastically comparing marriage equality to Harry Potter.

He assumed that this was probably Ted Cruz's response to marriage equality becoming legal:

“The insurance exchanges remain open, and committed same-sex couples can form lifelong, society-stabilizing, legally recognized bonds. Truly, Voldemort has risen. And the living will envy the dead.”

3. When he showed Mike Huckabee how to do simple math.

Huckabee said people were upset about the Indiana's Religious Freedom Restoration Act because of LGBT people.

“The reasons that those corporations put the pressure on Indiana and Arkansas was because the militant gay community put the pressure on them,” Huckabee said.

“Shut up!” Stewart said in response. “So when gays want equality, it’s militancy, and when Christians want to deny service, it’s freedom?”

4. When he taught all Republican candidates the definition of "delusional." 

Many Republican candidates have announced they are running for president, but someone had to let them know that their chances are slim.

“You know the beginning of the season on the Big Brother show before they vote all the crazy people out who you know are never going to win?” he asked. “That’s where we are at in the republican presidential race.”

5. When he ate a "hate cake" to teach Texas lawmakers a "moldy" and "tear" filled lesson.

Before marriage equality passed, several lawmakers in Texas held cake ceremonies, where they ate cake to celebrate a "decade-old amendment to the state's constitution that bans marriage equality."

So Stewart made his own cake and said:

“This is the best hate cake I’ve ever had!” Stewart exclaimed. “It’s so good! It tastes like moldy Bibles and the tears of the decent.”

6. When he had to teach Caitlyn Jenner an unfortunate lesson about sexism in mainstream media.

After Caitlyn Jenner's Vanity Fair cover came out, many focused on her physical appearance. Stewart says it's because she is now a woman:

“Caitlyn, when you were a man, we could talk about your athleticism, your business acumen. But now you’re a woman, which means your looks are really the only thing we care about.”

“Wow! Remind her she has an expiration date now!” Stewart said. “You came out at 65, and you’ve got another two years before you become invisible to society. Better make the most of it.”

"Caitlyn Jenner, congratulations. Welcome to being a woman in America.”

7. When he made everyone a list of the most anti-gay countries and called it the "Homophobic Olympics." 

Russia came out on top as the place "where the police don't always help the people beating you." He called it, "Going backwards for the Olympics." 

8. When he taught the NFL that having a gay player in the league is a "problem" they probably need.

Many NFL players were accused of domestic and child abuse, but the NFL and their advertisers were not tackling the issue seriously.

Stewart responded to this by saying:

"How crazy is this? A company that sells alcohol is the moral touchstone of the NFL. Maybe one of the only substances that is proven scientifically to increase the likelihood of domestic abuse. That company is saying to the NFL, 'You guys got a real problem here.'"

Stewart then referenced the days when drafting Michael Sam was their biggest "problem":

"Remember those days? How scared the NFL was back then, that a gay man would ruin their league? Oh what the NFL wouldn't do right now for that kind of distraction."

 

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Yezmin Villarreal

<p>Yezmin always has a coffee in her hand. She&#39;s a writer from Phoenix, AZ, who is interested in the intersection of race, sex, and gender in pop culture.</p>

<p>Yezmin always has a coffee in her hand. She&#39;s a writer from Phoenix, AZ, who is interested in the intersection of race, sex, and gender in pop culture.</p>