7 Reasons to Leave the Town Where You Transitioned

After I transitioned in a small mountain town, I struggled with the judgment from people who watched me transition. They commented on my looks and compared my presentation as male to my body before I transitioned. Living in a place I once called home began to make me claustrophobic While, I am grateful for the little liberal city where I transitioned, I do not miss it and I enjoy my post-transition freedom in my new home. Here are seven reasons to relocate after transition. 

Some people never change

The knowledge of your trans status should be treated as a gift. Some people may refuse to educate themselves and will continue to misgender and dead name you after you come out just because they "knew you before". Those people probably won't change and they don't deserve to know your trans; they won't respect you or your decision to transition. 

Your need new friends in your new life

When I transitioned, I experienced intense depression, which caused me to act out and withdraw from society. I pushed people away and some of my relationships could not withstand the weight of transition. By starting fresh, I was able to build new relationships and stabilize my life.

Dating gets easier

Dating is tough for everyone, but especially so for trans people. Our pool of potential partners is small compared to that of cisgender folks. And, in small towns, everyone knows everybody. By moving to a new city, you deepen your pool of potential lovers. 

Big cities can be more trans-friendly

Some places, like New York City and San Francisco, offer more resources for trans people (i.e.., facilities, groups, social activities, and health care). It's great to try to attain these things in smaller areas, but if you're tired of struggling, a bigger city with easier access to resources and an active community might be a nice break.

It's easier to find a job

After transition, I found finding a job to be treally challenging. Even after I changed my name and gender marker, unemployment was an issue. Too many people knew me pre-transition and avoided having a trans activist working in their restaurant. When I moved, being stealth at work made my life much more enjoyable and a lot less stressful. 

Life is too short

Some transgender people spend their whole lives trying to become their true self. Who has time for that? Life's too short. If you can, after you transition, find a new place to call home and start fresh.