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Chris Evans Just Eviscerated Boston's Straight Pride Parade

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Taylor Henderson

Three straight guys in Boston are attempting to launch a Straight Pride Parade, so naturally, the internet decided to absolutely roast it. The memes were overflowing like the sea of khaki pants and cargo shorts will be on that bleak August day.

And this morning, even Captain America chimed in on the shitstorm.

"Wow! Cool initiative, fellas!!" tweeted actor Chris Evans. "Just a thought, instead of ‘Straight Pride’ parade, how about this: The ‘desperately trying to bury our own gay thoughts by being homophobic because no one taught us how to access our emotions as children’ parade? Whatta ya think? Too on the nose??"

Evans then cosigned the thoughts of James Bell, who wrote:

"It's official. Boston is going to have a 'Straight Pride Parade.' 

I'm straight. I like being straight. A big reason why I like being straight is that I've never once experienced bigotry for my sexuality. I didn't have to fight for my right to marry the person of my choosing. I didn't have to concern myself with being beaten or killed because others didn't accept who I wanted to sleep with. I didn't have to stay closeted out of fear, or worry about the reaction of my family, friends, or colleagues by coming out. 

I never got called a slur for being straight. No one told me I'm going to burn in hell for being straight. There aren't any programs where I could be sent to be tortured into no longer being straight. There aren't any countries where you can be put to death simply for being straight. 

There is nothing I ever had to fight for, or struggle against, because I'm straight. And therefore, there isn't any reason to take pride in it. Grateful for the privileges I get? Sure. But pride? I don't see it. 

What I do see is that this parade is misnamed. It's not a 'Straight Pride Parade." It should be called a 'I'm a homophobic piece of shit' parade."

Evans quote tweeted Fell's breakdown with more words of his own. 

"Wow, the number gay/straight pride parade false equivalencies are disappointing. For those who don’t understand the difference, see below. Instead of going immediately to anger (which is actually just fear of what you don’t understand) take a moment to search for empathy and growth."

Evans wasn't the only celeb to chime in on that controversy. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and the band Smash Band also had some thoughts:

 

 

Now back to your regularly scheduled Pride!

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