8 Tips for Queer People Starting Your First Office Job

Cubicles, water coolers, stuffy business attire—corporate life is definitely one of a kind. Nine-to-fives can feel like a trap, especially for people who are part of the LGBTQ community because a lot of what comes with a "happy work life" involves conforming to very straight, very cis and very corporate ideals. But it doesn't have to be all ho-hum and short sleeve dress shirts. Here are a few ways I've learned to be more comfortable me while working an office job. I hope these tips can help you, too!

1. Seek out like-minded co-workers: You may be the only LGBTQ person, but odds are you're not the only cool person. Scope out people that spark your interest and learn a bit about them. Maybe have lunch together, or do that oddly corporate thing where people chat online even though you're sitting across from each other. There's nothing like having allies at work or even just one work boo. They really can brighten your day. 

2. Take breaks: It's very easy to get sucked into corporate life and stay at your desk all day. Don't do that. Trust me, it's draining and oddly dehumanizing. Take time away from your desk, even if it's just for 5-10 minutes. And eat lunch every day! These little things will make a big difference in your mood.

3. Don't be afraid to talk to HR: This is one extremely acceptable time to express any sort of nonsense you may be dealing with on the job. Intolerant comments, constant misuse of pronouns, sexism of any kind—tell them. Human resources is meant to be the space where you can go to improve office life and it can benefit you to take advantage of that. 

4. Get to know your boss: See if you can have a one-on-one meeting with your boss, if you don't already, to get to know each other. Life is easier when your boss is in your corner and understands where you're coming from. No need to tell them your life story but it does help to talk to them—human to human—and express any concerns you may have about your new gig.

5. Dress as much for comfort and as much like yourself as possible: Many office jobs require a certain type of attire but in the end, it's really about what makes you the most comfortable. For a lot of people within the queer community, clothing is a big part of how we express ourselves to the world. Tweak that dress code to work for you the best way you see fit, because if you're not comfortable it will be more difficult to do your job.

6. Remember your job does not define you: We're all trying to make it out here however we can. Just because you've landed an office job doesn't mean that you're a corporate person now. Do your job well, but remember that in the end—it's just a job. Your job can mean as much to you as you want it to, and nothing more. 

7. Know your worth: For a lot of us, getting our first major job may make us feel the need to be excessively humble, and to some extent that's true. But your bosses hired you for a reason. You're a valuable part of your company or else they wouldn't be paying you. Don't let anyone at your job take advantage of that fact.

8. Know when it's time to go: I had a really bad experience with one of my past office jobs in which my co-workers constantly misused my pronouns, said ignorant things about my gender and race, and made me feel uncomfortable. Even after talking to HR the same issues persisted. Sometimes the environment may be so toxic that the only way to find peace is to leave. That's okay. I'm not saying drop everything without backup, but do be aware of when you feel it's time to go and begin making steps to move on. This is not the last job you will ever find. Something else will come eventually and you deserve better.