When Orange Is the New Black's Piper Chapman (Taylor Schilling) planted her work-boots on that courtyard picnic table and asked her fellow inmates if they wanted to join her on a “miraculous adventure”, little did they know what kind of blood, sweat and, er, all the rest was in store…

6. She's promoting a cottage (cheese?) industry.
 

"I give you flavor packets, and you give me something you’re already giving away for free. And you are supporting a local business."

5. She's encouraging body confidence.

"I, too, was once embarrassed and squeamish about my personal eau de parfum. But then I thought, why should I be ashamed?"

4. She's taking back female power.

"Isn’t that part of the self hatred that has been bred into me by the patriarchy? And those same men that will shame me? Are they not the same men that will wear my panties on their head, inhaling deeply?"

3. She'll spread the glory of Litchfield far and wide.

"Let them say that Litchfield is a place where women love their bodies, and have love to spare... Our panties will travel the world."

2. She's going to make her panty girls IMMORTAL.

"Long after we are gone, our smell will linger in some gas station in Toronto, in some office cubicle in Tokyo. And in that way, we are known, and in that way, we are remembered. Do you want to be remembered?"

1. She's offering FREEDOM to the captive.

"Sweat profusely, and fart with abandon, and make a reek, make a reek my sisters, make a reek to last one thousand years!"

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