36 Thoughts You Have Before Coming Out As Bisexual

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Coming out is an overwhelming time. At any given moment, you have a hundred thoughts swirling around in your head. Everyone who comes out has questions, concerns, and unique ideas about what coming out will mean for them and their loved ones.

When you're coming out as bisexual, some of the questions/concerns are the same as coming out as any other identity, but there are also a few unique to us and us alone. For us, the pre-coming out party looks something like this:

1. Do I really have to come out now if I'm dating someone of a different gender than me?

2. I mean, is it really so bad if people continue on thinking I'm straight?

3. Yeah. Yeah, it is. Because I'm not straight. Like, at all.

4. But am I sure I'm bi?

5. Of course I'm sure. Please.

6. How public do I wanna be here? Are we talking minor revelations with close friends or are we talking going Facebook official?

7. Facebook does offer an option for bisexuals, right? Let me check...

8. So I can check "Men" and "Women," but that's it? Come on, Facebook. It's 2015. Gender is not a binary. Pull yourself together.

9. Oh, shit. My whole extended family are friends with me on Facebook. I don't want some random third cousin knowing about this right now!

10. I'm still trying to figure out how to navigate this for myself. That's hard enough without my ten-year-old cousin Becca messaging me questions.

11. How will this change how people see me?

12. And if it does change how people see me, will it be in a good way or a bad way?

13. Everyone's going to label me the token gay in the group. I can just feel it.

14. Will people automatically assume I'm polyamorous?

15. Oh my god, I'm going to get so many threesome invitations.

16. That's annoying. Flattering, but annoying. And misguided.

17. They're all gonna think I'm promiscuous and whatnot. Like some kind of crazy sex junkie.

18. That's on them, though. That's some ignorant shit. We can teach 'em.

19. Am I gonna be accepted by the gay and lesbian communities? Maybe they won't think I'm queer enough...

20. Will I be accepted in the straight community? I'm sure as hell not straight enough...

21. Am I ready to give up the privileges that come with passing as straight?

22. Is my attraction evenly split between people of my own gender and people of other genders?

23. Do I have a slight preference for one gender over others?

24. Is it okay to have a preference?

25. Oh, god. People are going to ask me the "If you had to choose a gender" question, aren't they?

26. Why do people even have to come out at all? This seems like an outdated idea.

27. I'm just me! That's it. Why do I need to announce this? I feel like I'm being punished.

28. I guess I'll just think of it this way: I come out now, so others won't have to in the future. #ChangeTakesTime

29. Wait, what's the difference between "bisexual" and "pansexual" again? I should probably know that, huh?

30. Are people gonna ask me that?

31. Wait. Is there a difference? I should Google it...I'm gonna Google it.

32. I don't even know how to begin explaining this to grandma.

33. Deep breath. This is scary.

34. It's pretty exciting too, though...

35. Whoo! Living in authenticity, whoo!

36. Let's do this.