These 12 "Reasons" For U-hauling Are Actually Red Flags

There’s a reason the lesbian community got stuck with a slang term like U-Haul: we seem to move in with each other much too quickly. Which ultimately, says a lot about how much we value thinking large decisions all the way through.

Go ahead and stand behind whatever excuses you want to, but know that moving in with your girlfriend after a month (or a few months) is a bad idea and if one of the following excuses reasons is on your “why this is a good idea” list—then they’re probably red flags. If you do it, be ready to pack up your shit very soon (keep your boxes).

1. “It’s the only way I can afford to live there.”

NOPE. Do not, we repeat DO NOT move in with your girlfriend so you can live in a certain part of town.

2. “We never stay over at our own places anyway.”

Codependency is not a good thing. Young lesbians of the world: learn to spot codependent antics, like never ever spending a night apart, early on, so you can nip that bullshit in the bud and have a mature relationship. Say it with me, “boundaries.”

3. “I have a feeling we’re going to last.”

Not a good sign if you’re already voicing your “feelings” about your new girlfriend, but not thinking things like, signing a lease together, all the way through.

4. “She lives closer to my school/office/family.”

If you’re only moving in with the girl out of convenience, what the hell are you even doing with your life? You a cold bitch.

5. “I like her roommates better than mine.”

Although this is a compelling reason, because hating your roommates is the worst fucking thing (you just wait, kids living in dorm rooms, it only gets worse!), it’s NOT a good thing that you’re thinking more about the other people you’re living with than you are about living with your girlfriend.

6. “She has a better apartment than me.”

Moving in for vain reasons is a major red flag.

7. “She really wants me to.”

Do you really want? Because that’s what matters. Listen to your gut. Don’t be starry eyed. And don’t be swayed by seemingly possessive shit.

8. “It’s best to figure out if we can last living together early on.”

Learning if you two can live together is not something you want to learn, if you’re still getting to know a person. It take a long time to fully understand and know a person, and until you know them, you shouldn’t live with them.

9. “I want to see if she’s actually ready to commit to me.”

Never make huge life decisions to find out answers. You should only make huge life decisions once you’ve found the answers.

10. “I think it’ll make us stronger.”

It should be obvious that you shouldn’t move in with a person if you think you two already need work, need more from the person, etc. Pushing a person, even indirectly, never completely works.

11. “I don’t want to lose her.”

It’s a terrible sign if you’re worried that if you don’t move in with a girl, she won’t stay with you. You don’t need that noise. If this is on your list, you probably should move on.

12. “I don’t have anywhere else to live.”

You have bigger problems than the longevity of your relationship, if your only option for shelter is at your girlfriend’s house.