Kissing is a funny thing. For some people it’s a major romantic or sexual deal, and then there are people like me for whom it’s basically an indicator of emotional intimacy and not necessarily either of those things. I’ve kissed a lot of my friends at some point or another, and relatively few people who aren’t or weren’t to become so. But whatever your perspective, there’s no doubt that kissing somebody gives you a pretty intimate insight into who they are, what your relationship with them is like, what the chemistry between you is like, and what’s going on in your head at the time…
1) Whether you’re sexually attracted to them
Sure, lots of people don’t kiss folks they don’t find sexually attractive, and that’s fine (although a depressing number of people, particularly women, get pressured into it). But lots of us have been on dates with perfectly nice people who on paper would be great for us, but we somehow can’t seem to find a spark with. If you kiss them, it’s REALLY REALLY HARD to keep pretending that there’s something there – you’ll know right away if you fancy them or not.
2) How chemically compatible you are
Some people just taste wrong. They can be perfectly lovely, attractive people, but they just taste wrong, and so there’s no way it’ll ever work out in the long term. I don’t necessarily mean ‘they’ve just been eating a food you can’t stand’, although that’s probably a factor. It’s a biochemical thing to do with immune systems and antibodies and suchlike – we’re attracted to people with different immune systems – although I for one would like to see them repeat those studies with queer participants.