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Olympics' Coverage for Girls: Days 4 and 5, Lindsay Vonn, Johnny Weir

Olympics' Coverage for Girls: Days 4 and 5, Lindsay Vonn, Johnny Weir

Our resident lesbian sports afficionado Helen Wortham catches us up on the Olympics including Canada's Maelle Ricker, Lindsey Jacobellis' disappointing fall, Julia Mancuso's and Lindsey Vonn's silver and gold wins. Plus, Evan Lysacek in Vera Wang and Johnny Weir in a pink corset.

I think it was Kate Clinton who admitted she alternates her Olympic sports. She watches the hard-hitting events one year then switches to the more artistic ones the next. I have to admit, watching the women's board cross and downhill, I'm definitely enjoying the crazy ones in Vancouver. Having the downhill commentators exclaim, "she's going to be hitting the super G-spot at the next turn," will never get old.

Spills and chills abound, ladies. Canada's second gold went to Maelle Ricker in the snowboard cross on Day 4.  She puts a handful of snow down her back before each run as a cold reminder to stay focused, and it worked, but it was profound disappointment for American, Lindsey Jacobellis. In Torino she fell, costing her the gold, but keeping the silver medal. This time she slid into a gate and completely out of any medal contention.

I lost count of how many falls there were in the downhill race. I even think one athlete had to be airlifted out, but guess who kept it together for the gold. Yes, my blond goddess (BG), Lindsey Vonn. She becomes the first American to win gold in the downhill. Her teammate Julia Mancuso hit the G-spot and got silver. I'll get to see BG in four more events.

They tried to recreate the Cold War in the men's short program figure skating last night: East versus West. Russian Evgeni Plushenko came out of retirement and landed in top place, completing his signature quadruple jump. American Evan Lysacek is only a half a point behind in second, wearing a heterosexual black swan outfit created by Vera Wang. I know it was hetero because he said so himself.

Which brings us inevitably to Johnny Weir. He finished sixth wearing essentially a pink and black corset.

Don't get me wrong...I love figure skating-such pageantry and completely objective judging. Who can resist Sandra Bezic playing straight man to Scott Hamilton having a triple slachow every time someone "nails it!" Here's one of my favorite couples strutting their stuff on the ice.

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Helen Wortham