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Growing up was full of ups and downs for all of us, but growing up as a gay boy had its own special set of heartaches. We had to watch our girlfriends get super sweet toys full of glitter and pink plastic, while we stood by frustratated that we weren't playing with Lisa Frank or My Little Pony. Here are just a few of the badass toys we were always afraid to put on our Christmas and birthday lists:
1. Easy-Bake Oven
Luckily, most of us weren't worried about carbs and calories as tykes. A miniature device designed to give us unlimited baked goods whenever we wanted? This was a no-brainer.
2. All The Lisa Frank
So. Much. Pretty. From pencil boxes to folders, erasers to pencils, these were the drag queens of school supplies. (And yes, that's Mila Kunis IRL.)
3. American Girl Dolls
These puppies were so freaking expensive — but how could you resist all those accessories? Felicity? Molly? Come on, you know you had a favorite.
4. Pretty Pretty Princess
A board game that turned the winner into the princess you always knew you were. Eat your heart out, Operation.
5. Dream Phone
Pre-cell phone, this game was the only way to find out which dreamboat had a crush on you. Hey, Tinder, let's bring this back.
6. Barbie Power Wheels Corvette
This was the ONLY way to cruise around the playground. "Get in, loser, we're going to the monkey bars!"
7. Polly Pocket
Sure, you were bound to lose all the tiny pieces after a few play dates, but an entire doll world that lived in your pocket? We'd still play with this shit.
8. My Little Pony
Before it was cool to be a Brony, these colorful horsies captured our hearts — and made us experts at braiding manes.
9. Fashion Plates
We may not have known who the hell Yves Saint Laurent was, but we sure knew how to piece together a killer outfit that just begged to be rubbed into existence.
10. Glitter Magic Wands
Whether we were practicing our baton twirling skills or sitting mesmerized by cascading glitter waterfalls, these simple sticks were a must.
11. Dear Diary
How else were we supposed to keep our deepest darkest secrets, well, secret? Paper diaries were sooo 1980.
Is there any that we missed? Let us know!
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Dustin Diehl
Dustin loves writing, reading, and movies, and is basically a cat lady. He's passionate about travel, but most of all, he's obsessed with a little space opera called Star Wars.
Dustin loves writing, reading, and movies, and is basically a cat lady. He's passionate about travel, but most of all, he's obsessed with a little space opera called Star Wars.