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13 Struggles Only Vers Men Understand

13 Struggles Only Vers Men Understand

13 Struggles Only Vers Men Understand

“So...you’re a bottom?”

Alexander_Kirk

For those of you who don't know, being versatile (vers, for short) is a slang term used to describe a gay or bi man who can be either a top or bottom during sex. Being vers in the bedroom is hard for some to comprehend, because people just don't get that the role you play in intercourse isn't limited to a binary, and that you can absolutely appreciate two wildly contrasting (yet wildly appealing) sides of the spectrum.

While being vers is awesome and possible, it definitely does come with its hurdles. From preconceived notions to physical obstacles, here are 13 struggles only vers men understand.

1. Never knowing whether you need to be prepared to bottom or not.

2. Hook-ups assuming since you’ve bottomed before, you’re always a bottom.

3. Hook-ups assuming since you’ve topped before, you’re always a top.

4. Eliminating labels and persuading people you’re neither a vers top nor a vers bottom, but 100% versatile.

5. Being boxed out of a sexual encounter because a man is only looking for one specific position. 

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6. “But do you prefer to top more or bottom more?”

7.  By being the versatile one,  you’re often at the mercy of the other man’s position.

8.  “So you’re only into flip-f*cking?”

9. Every misconstrued stigma and stereotype a bottom has to deal with, vers men also have to deal with. 

10. When guys assume you’re not capable of being a proper bottom/top because you do both.

11. Just because you don’t have an established role in the bedroom, doesn’t mean you don’t have an established role in a relationship.

12. Entering a relationship with someone who is strictly one position never fully satisfies you.

13. People assume you’re versatile because you’re ashamed of being a bottom.

…when in reality you’re very proud to be bottom and equally proud to be a top!

30 Years of Out100Out / Advocate Magazine - Jonathan Groff and Wayne Brady

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Alexander Kirk

Alexander is a pop culture fanatic, who loves travelling, Taylor Swift and slaying Twitter, tweet by tweet.

Alexander is a pop culture fanatic, who loves travelling, Taylor Swift and slaying Twitter, tweet by tweet.