For queer people, coming out can be a terrifying process. For transgender people, coming out could mean losing your job. Coming out at work as trans can be unsafe; some people experience harassment and could be fired for being transgender. Before you start transition, check out these helpful tips to make it a more pleasant experience for everyone.
Step 1: Find an ally
The first person you tell should be someone you can rely on; ideally a friend. Many trans people elect to tell a coworker they trust. Coming out to your coworker could boost your confidence and make it easier when you tell your employer.
Step 2: Human Resources
If you work for a mom and pop shop, you probably don't have an HR department and need to make sure your employer is tolerant of LGBTs. If you don't think they'll react in a positive way, make sure you have other employment options. If you work for a large company (i.e., retail, food and beverage service), you should talk to HR before you share your intent to transition. Always be transparent and talk to them about your pronoun preference, upcoming name change and presentation.
Step 3: Come out to your boss
When you come out to your employer, schedule a one-on-one meeting and tell them in person. If you fear their reaction, ask HR to accompany you for support. Coming out to your boss could provide an ally with the power to make your transition at work smoother. They will probably out you to a small portion of the management team, but full transparency is critical to a professional and safe environment.
Step 4: Coming out to your coworkers
If you work in an office and use email as a primary form of communication, you can coordinate with your HR department to send a mass email informing your coworkers. It's probably best to tell those you trust in person, but informing everyone of your name change and pronoun preference is very important. Your HR department or supervisor should address your need to use the appropriate bathroom; it's better if they handle this request. If a coworker feels uncomfortable with you, they need to talk to HR.
Step 5: Official name change
Request a new name badge and an email address that corresponds with your chosen name. In addition, HR should update your hire paperwork to reflect your gender marker and preferred name — unless you've had a legal name change.
Step 6: Set boundaries
If some of your coworkers' questions make you uncomfortable, set boundaries and tell them how you feel. It's best to establish your limits early so you feel safe and safe at work.
Step 7: Just be you
Congratulations! The hard part is over, so get used to being yourself and get back to work.