While much of the western world has been embroiled in the royal nuptias of Prince William and Kate Middleton, we at SheWired have Calzona on the brain now that Callie is on the mend. The last time we encountered TV’s most adorable lesbian doc couple Callie and Arizona, Callie (Sara Ramirez) was singing for her life in the Grey’s Anatomy Musical Event episode.
The big-piped Tony winner Ramirez was long ago, ostensibly, the catalyst for Shonda Rhimes' inspiration for a musical episode that turned out to be highly successful. I’m still watching Sara sing the hell out of “The Story” and tearing up a month later.
In case you’ve been in Africa helping the “little humans” like a philanthropic Dr. Arizona Robbins, here’s the nutshell on their storyline. Arizona (Jessica Capshaw) dumped Callie and took off to Africa. Licking her wounds, Callie got loaded and bedded down with Mark – repeatedly – resulting in a – what else? -- pregnancy. You’d think Drs. Torres and Sloane would invest in a box of condoms But Shonda Rhimes needed to keep the narrative moving forward so Callie got knocked up.
Arizona, coming to her senses and realizing Callie is about the best babe on the planet, returned to become the third wheel in the baby making process. Baby mama, daddy and lesbian lover eventually worked out a plan -- although anyone with less patience then Arizona would have choked Mark (Eric Dane) with a stethoscope.
En route to a weekend getaway for just the ladies Arizona proposed to Callie right before getting into a crash that sent Callie hurtling through the windshield. An entire episode, replete with musical showstoppers, was devoted to saving Callie and her wee one, and that brings us just about up to speed and this week’s episode with Callie’s recovery.
It’s a Long Way Back Ep. 7:19, SPOILERS
Callie’s long road back opens with a shot of baby Sofia Robbin Sloane Torres – I’m not sure I like Mark’s name sandwiched between Arizona’s and Callie’s as he’s sandwiched himself between everything else, but…-- in the NICU at one week old and at 1 pound and one ounce.
Cut to Yang (Sandra Oh), Arizona and Bailey (Chandra Wilson) at the foot of Callie’s hospital bed cheering her on as Callie valiantly struggles to open her hand all the way.
Initially jubilant and suddenly defeated, Callie’s clearly struggling with her post-crash limitations. It’s apparent she will not be a cooperative patient. Recognizing Callie’s frustration Arizona goes to comfort her.
“It’s okay. You’re retraining your brain. Getting your fingers straight was the goal for today,” Arizona says.
“Little goals,” Bailey adds. Arizona gives Callie a peck on the lips just as Mark comes in with the baby report, a video of little Sofia that puts a smile on Callie’s face.
“Today? I can see her today?” she asks Bailey. But Bailey insists Callie can’t see her baby until Callie can be mobilized and her infections are completely gone, sending Callie into a well-deserved crying spell. On a side note, here’s hoping Ms. Ramirez of the big voice and big browns lands an Emmy nod for her arc on Grey’s this year!
“She would if she could (let Callie see the baby),” Yang tells Callie about Bailey. But an implacable Callie – who is still struggling to open her fingers all the way -- just flips her hand at Yang.
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“Are you giving me the finger?” Yang asks.
“Yes I am,” Callie replies bluntly.
“Good job,” Yang says, eliciting a laugh from Callie. And it’s clear that Yang is the perfect person to be in Callie’s recovery room.
Later at the Callie and Yang show, the pair are expectedly sniping at one another. Yang explains that Callie’s stuck with her because Yang had a falling out with Dr. Altman (Kim Raver) over Callie’s ventricular something-or-other following the accident. Wanting to pushing beyond her limitations Callie suggests Yang help her sit up so that she can get a step closer to seeing her baby.
“She’s mostly tubes and wires, and she looks more like a chicken than a baby – like a featherless, beakless chicken. You wanna wait until she’s cuter,” Yang says.
“You’re the worst godmother ever,” Callie mumbles.
Just then, Kepner (Sarah Drew) runs in oohing and ahhing over baby Sofia opening her eyes.
“They look just like yours,” she tells Callie, sending Callie into another crying jag. Sobbing, she grabs at the ring above her bed and tries to lift herself up as Yang attempts to calm her down.
“I’m missing her. I am missing her!” Callie says, with gut-wrenching emotion.
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“I know, I know honey,” Yang says.
“She could die and I’ll never… I could miss her whole life!” Callie shouts, leaving not a dry eye in American TV land.
With that Yang goes face to face with the dragon doc, Peds chief Stark (Peter MacNicol), in a vain attempt to arrange for Callie to see the baby, although down deep she knows it can’t happen until Callie is healed.
But Yang, being her lovely resourceful and devious self, hatches a plan to afford Callie visual contact with baby Sofia.
She enlists Kepner, Avery, Meredith, Karev and Lexie to execute the operation. The sextet of Seattle Grace staffers surreptitiously drives Callie’s bed through the hallways to the NICU.
Upon gazing at her baby for the first time Callie’s face lights up. “Hi baby,” she says, reaching her finger (for the first time since the accident) toward the window of the NICU, “Don’t worry. I’m a little messed up too. We’re gonna be fine. We’re gonna be just fine,” she says, flashing a signature Sara Ramirez grin.
Flash-forward just over a month to baby Sofia in NICU, now at 2 pounds, 8 ounces.
Cut to a physical therapist shouting at Arizona, “I’m a trained professional, and she’s an uncooperative, insulting…”
“Fiancée, of mine, so let’s just, let’s watch it,” Arizona warns, flashing a dimple.
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“He’s a wuss! Let him go,” Callie shouts from the peanut gallery. As the PT storms out Arizona points out that Callie has been through three physical therapists in a month. Callie, struggling with a medicine ball but sitting up says, “They don’t push me hard enough.”
“It’s a traumatic brain injury, not boot camp.” Arizona says.
“We’re getting married. You want me walking down the aisle not rolling right?” Callie asks, still pushing herself with the ball. But that reminds me of the wedding shots all over the web of Callie and Arizona looking like the most beautiful blushing TV brides ever.
But the determined Callie literally drops the ball, spurring her to throw a little tantrum during which she kicks at the walker by her feet. I’m thinking she’s kicking so that’s gotta be a sign of recovery but Callie shouts sorry to Arizona.
“The baby won’t wait. You can pick her up. You can hold the baby. Mark can hold the baby. I can’t hold my baby. Don’t tell me it’s okay,” Callie says. And here again, I’m hoping the Emmy voters are watching.
A loving Arizona nods as if to say she understands. “I’m sorry,” she says.
“Then bring me those balls please,” Callie says, inspiring Arizona to nod yes.
Next, Stark is explaining to Mark that baby Sofia is in heart failure when Arizona rushes in to say the specialists she’s sought out are not available to do surgery on the baby.
“I know I’m not high on your list but your baby’s out of time, you know it can’t be you…I’ve performed the procedure before so you’re stuck with me,” Stark tells his predecessor Arizona. And here’s where he gets her attention. “Although you’re not technically related to the baby…” he says.
“I’m sorry, WHAT?” Arizona says, as Stark interrupts her holding up his finger. “The hospital would have no ethical objection if I let you be in the O.R. with me.” he finishes, assuaging Arizona’s fears for the time being. It appears that Stark’s Grinch heart must indeed be growing a few inches.
Arizona runs off to tell Callie what’s happening with Sofia, but Callie, working as hard as she can to be well, is busy pushing Yang around on a gurney.
“She’s my new physical therapist,” Callie tells Meredith about why she’s hauling Yang around. “Because she does what I tell her to,” she adds, urging Meredith to hop on as well.
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A very pointed Arizona comes around the corner ordering everyone off the gurney, and they scatter like mice at a cat show. A proud Callie explains to Arizona that she’s done four laps around the hospital when Arizona interrupts with the news that Sofia needs surgery ASAP.
Clearly upset by the news Callie clutches at her stomach to discover she’s bleeding. As she collapses into Arizona’s arms —wouldn’t everyone love a Jessica Capshaw to collapse into if need be? -- it looks as though mom and baby will simultaneously end up in the O.R. again.
In a bit of déjà vu from last month’s musical event Callie is back on the table, this time with Bailey sewing her up.
“She’s worked herself into a rupture,” Bailey says, sending Yang off on a self-flagellating tangent for allowing Callie to push so hard.
“Yang, I’ve been telling Torres to slow down for weeks. The woman doesn’t listen, so stop kicking yourself and just help me fix it,” Bailey says.
Just then Mark walks in to check on Callie while Arizona calls from Sofia’s O.R. with a status update. Fast forward to toward the end of the simultaneous mother/daughter operations – Callie and Sofia are going to love the luxury of mother/daughter mani/pedis down the line – and it looks like all is going well.
Mark gives a run-down on Callie’s stats saying, “we’re home,” just as Sofia starts to flat line. He sprints down to the baby’s O.R. to find Arizona in the hallway slumped over and sobbing, and I’m thinking I really can not cry my eyes out to another Grey’s downer, so please Shonda Rhimes let this not be true…
And my Grey’s prayers are answered. Mark speeds off into the O.R. and then pokes his head out to tell Arizona she needs to be in the operating room.
“You missed the good part Dr. Robbins. She tried to bleed out but I wouldn’t let her,” Stark says.
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Flash forward to the final third of the long road to recovery and we are at 12 weeks. Baby Sofia is up to an impressive 5 pounds, 8 ounce, and mama Callie is picking her up for some mama / baby bonding time when Bailey walks up.
“Are you going to tell me to get back in bed because I just got here,” Callie says, flashing a slight side-eye at Bailey.
But Bailey has good news as she informs Callie it’s time for Callie to go home.
“Did you hear that? We’re going home,” Callie says, cradling Sofia, but then realizing Sofia is not cleared for take off.
A bit later baby mamas Callie and Arizona are having a little Sofia bonding moment by her crib when Callie says she doesn’t’ want to go home without her wee one.
Stark, proving less and less that he’s a full-on bastard, says the baby can go, to the surprise of baby mamas and daddy. It turns out that if Sofia passes the infant carrier test she can go home, with the caveat that she’s got three doctor parents at home who can keep an eye on her.
Peds doc extraordinaire Arizona explains that to pass the infant carrier test Sofia has to sit in the carrier for an hour with no apnea and or some other medical issue that I can’t begin to understand never mind spell. Mark runs off to get the carrier as Arizona kisses Stark’s cheek.
Later, Callie, Arizona, Mark, Bailey and Kepner are standing in a semi-circle counting down baby Sofia’s final five seconds in the carrier, a feat she pulls off with flying colors.
“I can’t believe she’s leaving,” Yang says to Hunt (Kevin McKidd).
“She’s cute isn’t she?” he says.
But the ever-ambitious Yang corrects him. “No. Callie, she was my last cardio patient,” she says.
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A flurry of activity ensues as Kepner takes a photo of Sofia for the “graduate wall,” Mark preps to pick up the carrier and Arizona does a mental checklist of everything Sofia will need, but Callie stops the action.
“Everybody STOP! Stop, stop, stop, stop…” Callie says. “She’s not ready, she can’t leave,” Callie says, going on an overprotective mommy rant. “She’s not getting in a car. It’s not safe,” Callie adds, letting on her real fears. And for the third time this episode I’m going to suggest handing Sara R. the Emmy now.
Leave it to Bailey to put things into perspective for Callie. Bailey the sage explains that everything from a bookcase to a sneezing person isn’t safe for a baby. “You don’t feel this way because you were in an accident. You feel this way because you are a parent. It’ll pass mostly. Some of it never will,” Bailey says.
Later, Callie’s being wheeled out of Seattle Grace with baby and her betrothed Arizona at her side.
Mark greets them at the car and takes the baby bag out of Arizona’s hand. And just like that Mark has proved his usefulness as a diaper bag carrier. Nah… he’s been more tolerable lately and all kids need a father figure, blah, blah, blah…
Tune in next week for the Callie and Arizona nuptials – the most anticipated lesbian TV wedding since Carol and Susan did it 15 years ago on Friends!
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