When your sense of self is rattled by a monster crush on Tegan and Sara, who better to give you advice than Tegan Quin herself?
In Dan Savage’s column published Wednesday titled “Girl Power,” a 22-year-old woman writes that she’s always liked boys, but that a massive crush on Tegan and Sara when she was 20 left her confused about her sexuality. Anguished, she writes, “I know many hetero-identifying people experience same-sex crushes, but can someone's whole sexual orientation just change overnight?”
She asked the sex columnist for his advice on sorting through her feelings, but Savage did her one better and had Tegan Quin answer the letter. He stepped back from doling out advice and instead let one half of the lesbian indie duo do the talking.
"When I was young, I dated boys," wrote Tegan. "I never thought about love or being 'in love.' And I never thought about sexuality. I was lucky to have a group of friends much more interested in each other than dating. And so I was fairly untroubled about my status. Until I kissed a girl. Then I knew who I really was. I was gay.”
Tegan advised the young woman to explore what she likes and not worry so much about labels.
"Sexuality is not hard lines," she wrote. "It's not black and white. Not for all of us, anyway. Some people know their whole lives who they are. Some people don't. My advice: Go and kiss a girl, go and hold a boy's hand. Don't worry about who you are until you find out what you like. Maybe you'll like both—and yay if that's the way it turns out, because that means you have twice as many people to fall in love with.”
Read the full column here.