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Where the Girls Are on TV: Tyra Banks, Otalia, Oprah, Jackie Warner

Where the Girls Are on TV: Tyra Banks, Otalia, Oprah, Jackie Warner

This week in television Sara Ramirez and Jessica Capshaw get their lesbian groove on, sort of, on Grey's.Oprah talks women who leave men for women with Jackie Warner...look out. Tyra Banks ans Suze Orman get GLAAD. Plus, lesbian guests make out on Tyra's couch. Eden Riegel's Bianca arrives back in Pine Valley on AMC this week. Good thing Tamara Braun's Reese can see again. Sarah Paulson on Cupid and Otalia in a hospital bed?

It looks like my life has become a mind-bending crash with all things non-gay this past week. This means no sex, no dates, no love and my definitely straight female cat that judges me so harshly with her incessant meowing at every girl that has ever stepped foot in my apartment. Due to my seldom hectic schedule and crappy work ethics, I decided to partake in the boss’s offer to let you all in on where the girls are on television.

Let’s begin with ABC’s Grey’s Anatomy where Arizona and Callie shared a lil dance at Callie's place and I fell asleep waiting for some action to take place. I’m not worried for some reason. Wow—and I never say that.

While I’m on the subject of Grey’s, I hear that Katherine Heigl is apparently begging not to have her character Izzie killed off the show due to the fact that she loves her job. Duh. Really Katherine? Are you sure you don’t want to have my job that gloriously entails sitting on my couch typing away for hours, only to stand up to realize my back is out and my feet have fallen asleep? No really, free food, a six-digit paycheck and hot ass to glare at all day sounds much more miserable.

Bravo’sbreakout hot lesbian celebrity fitness guru Jackie Warner of the hit reality series Work Out spoke with the Oprah show via satellite in an episode about women that leave their men for other women. Phew! That was a mouthful.

Oprah asked Warner about her recent brush with fame, “Since the inception of the show I have received literally thousands of emails and letters from all over the country primarily in middle America,” she said.

“Straight women always did gravitate toward me. More so than lesbians,” Warner continued, “Sexiness really comes from working with your body and being very confident on that level. And I have that.”

Warner’s straight ex-lover Rebecca from Work Out says that her lesbian tendencies were “Jackie-specific” and she has been in a happy relationship with a man for the past year. Okay, I kind of get it. I would take Brad Pitt if I could, but only to get an idea of what Angelina does with her bedside manner. I’m just sayin.'

One guest on Oprah speaks about how she had realized clearly that she was gay and came to tell her husband and children about her discovery. That ends happily. The woman now lives with her partner and the kids appear to accept and respect it.

Oprah and her myriad of guests talked about the strange gaps and roominess in between the straight, gay and bisexual. A lot of confused people on the show, which only makes me more confused about what I want for dinner tonight.

Speaking of Oprah wannabes, this brings me to the girl-on-girl love fest on the Tyra Banks Show. Ty Ty’s guests included “straight” girls with crushes on their lesbian friends and co-workers. Some good making out happened on the talk show host’s cushy couch finally.

Tyra seemed shocked that girls were not that into her. I have to say that with a little tape over her non-therapist-but-I-dish-out-advice-anyway mouth, I could possibly have five to seven minutes of mindless fun before I had to feed my fat cat.

Tyra Banks and Suze Orman were among the celebrities honored at the GLAAD Media Awards in New York Saturday night. Clay Aiken presented Tyra Banks with the excellence in media award. Okay, so she has done a lot for the lesbian community and I do watch her show. But damn it if I try not to!

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ER is hitting its last and final episode this coming Thursday after 2 million years on the air. NBC sure knows how to milk a hospital drama. If only the original Melrose Place lasted this long. I want to give a special shout out and thanks to Michael Crichton for his honorable LGBT storylines and props. R.I.P.

Not a perfect week in critic world for the naughty self-proclaimed bisexual hot mama Megan Mullally. ABC’s comedy In the Motherhood aired its television premiere without a standing ovation. Last Thursday’s show was a tad trite and the writing was so-so, but it just wasn’t as funny as it was set up to be. Perhaps it was all the hype, the hysterical cast—including Cheryl Hines—and all the laugh-out-loud commercials that I watched in lieu of my pee-breaks, but some folks have called it a let down.

However, I never say never. Except of course when it comes to sleeping with my ex girlfriend, I hate that beeatch. Anyway, I will definitely tune in next week. After all, every show deserves a second chance. Well, except for the OC.

On ABC’s daytime drama All My Children Reese can see out of her beautiful eyes again, yeah! Now perhaps she will see that the lesbian story line has been missing for quite some time. Word on the street is that Bianca is set to make a return in late April.

Guiding Light almost gave me something to drop my dolly for when Natalia and Olivia almost shared a tender kiss in a hospital bed...HOT. But she awakens (on purpose, we find out) and the spell is magically broken. It was looking like Natalia and Frank may marry after she did accept his proposal, barely. Olivia kind of flips out when searching for answers from in-lesbian Doris and realizes that it may just be too difficult to come out after all. Okey-dokey.

Airing this Tuesday is the ABC drama Cupid starring out lesbian Sarah Paulson. She plays a psychiatrist specializing in relationships who forms a friendship with self-proclaimed Roman God of Love, Trevor, played by Bobby Cannavale of Will and Grace. This sounds like a genuine mix of creepy meets stupid. Right up my alley. Hence, my ex-girlfriend.

Missed the last Where the Girls Are? Read it here!

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