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Sam Smith Says Ed Sheeran Gave Them An Enormous Two-Ton Penis

Sam Smith on The Kelly Clarkson Show
Courtesy of NBC

“I’m gonna have to get it craned into my house.”

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Sam Smith has a six-foot-long, two-ton penis. That’s not a joke (or a brag), just a fact.

While appearing on The Kelly Clarkson Show, the “Unholy” singer opened up about a very special gift they received from fellow musician Ed Sheeran.

Clarkson asked Sheeran about a recent “trophy” they received and Smith began laughing. “Oh my God... It’s actually wild. I thought it was a joke, but it’s a six-foot-two marble penis,” Smith confessed. “It’s two tons, and I’m gonna have to get it craned into my house.”

As for what he’s actually going to do with it, Smith said they has plans. “Well, I want to turn it into a fountain, which I think will be hard to do.”

Turns out Smith isn’t the first one to receive such an honor. This is apparently the second time Sheeran has gifted someone “a concrete penis”; Sir Elton John received one as well, of course.

Sam Smith and Kelly ClarksonCourtesy of NBC

John previously shared the story on the Australian program show The Carrie and Tommy Show. “I suggested to [my husband] David [Furnish] that I should put it in the garden. And he said, ‘No, we have children,’” the legendary musician recalled, noting that it was now “hidden in an area in the house where they wouldn’t see it.”

“But it’s a beautifully made penis. What can I tell you?” John said. “What do you buy the man who has everything? A huge marble penis!”

Naturally, when Smith opened up about Sheeran’s gift, Clarkson wanted to know if they had given his new artwork a name. They hadn’t, so the two brainstormed one. Smith suggested both “Philip” and “Kevin” — the latter Clarkson rejected for reminding her of Home Alone — then she suggested one that stuck: “Duke of Hastings” after the Bridgerton season one heartthrob played by Simon Basset.

Sheeran just took being an ally to a whole new (literally rock-hard) level.

Watch Sam Smith talk about the penis statue Ed Sheeran gifted them below.

Ed Sheeran Gifted Sam Smith A 6-Foot Marble Penis Statue

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Rachel Shatto

EIC of PRIDE.com

Rachel Shatto, Editor in Chief of PRIDE.com, is an SF Bay Area-based writer, podcaster, and former editor of Curve magazine, where she honed her passion for writing about social justice and sex (and their frequent intersection). Her work has appeared on Dread Central, Elite Daily, Tecca, and Joystiq. She's a GALECA member and she podcasts regularly about horror on the Zombie Grrlz Horror Podcast Network. She can’t live without cats, vintage style, video games, drag queens, or the Oxford comma.

Rachel Shatto, Editor in Chief of PRIDE.com, is an SF Bay Area-based writer, podcaster, and former editor of Curve magazine, where she honed her passion for writing about social justice and sex (and their frequent intersection). Her work has appeared on Dread Central, Elite Daily, Tecca, and Joystiq. She's a GALECA member and she podcasts regularly about horror on the Zombie Grrlz Horror Podcast Network. She can’t live without cats, vintage style, video games, drag queens, or the Oxford comma.